How to Make Up With Your Boyfriend After A Fight

How to make up with your boyfriend after a fight is a problem women have faced for centuries. If you come back to him too fast or too strong, he'll see it as being clingy and run the other way, but if you don't talk to him at all, you'll come off as not interested, and he'll just move on. So what should you do?

Fighting is a complicated thing between men and women, because it means different things to each gender. If you really want to make up with him, you'll need to understand a few things about the way guys work through problems, especially relationship problems.

Guys have a stigma in their minds that they're not allowed to appear vulnerable or weak to you, Morticia addams costume so make sure you avoid confronting him. Never ask "Are you still mad at me?" or "Am I still in trouble?". Even if you ask it nicely, part of him hears a challenge to continue the argument you were having, so don't say it. Keep the first conversation after a fight light. Talk about your day or tell him a funny story. If you can get him laughing it will make life a lot easier for both of you. If not, that's okay too. You've still got a shot.

The first conversation should take place in either neutral territory or on his turf. Remember, you need him to feel safe and secure as he talks to you, like he has the power. Whether he really does or not, you need to let him think he does. It will make him feel more at ease. The internet is good for these talks too, because his computer is one of his safest places.

Don't touch him at the beginning of the conversation. Remember, there's still a part of him that's fighting with you, and he'll be very careful about any intimacy. After you've both had a good laugh, ease into light touches on the arm or shoulder, something safe that says "I'm being friendly, but not invading your space".

If he brings up the subject you were arguing over or the events that caused it, just let him talk. He's testing the waters to see where you stand on the subject. Even if you still hotly disagree with him or feel anxious about it, let it roll past you. Do NOT get upset. If he's worth making up with, it will be worth letting go of the issue.

If you have a nice conversation without bringing up the touchy subject, that's great. Let it go, don't bring it up until later. The subtext here is you saying "I care about you, I want to fix the relationship before we worry about the argument."

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